What is JOMO? The growing trend sees people canceling plans at the last minute to embrace the joy of missing out – and you’ll never believe their excuses.

  • JOMO, the joy of missing out, is seen as the exact opposite of FOMO and is trending
  • People are increasingly canceling stay-at-home plans, often at the last minute
  • Canceling a plan gives us a huge rush of happiness, says psychologist Cass Dunn.

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People are sharing the ‘funniest reasons they’ve unfriended’ as JOMOs, or the disappearance trend continues to grow.

The trend, which has been on the rise since the end of the Covid lockdown, sees people canceling plans at the last minute in favor of ‘doing nothing’.

Online, people have admitted to canceling ‘because they have dandruff’, in favor of ‘looking at their plants’ or chilling with their pets.

People have revealed some of the excuses they use to get out of seeing their friends.

People have revealed some of the excuses they use to get out of seeing their friends.

Psychologist Cass Dunn, founder of Crappy to Happy, defines JOMO as ‘the pure enjoyment of what you are doing in each moment without regard to what everyone else is doing’.

In essence the exact opposite of FOMO, the fear of missing out.

‘There’s no better feeling than sending that life-changing text to cancel plans so you can hit the couch instead,’ she told FEMAIL.

Popular activities include watching television on the couch or snuggling up with ice cream.

And it’s not just older people who are ditching their well-thought-out plans to stay in, in fact, according to research by ice cream company Ben & Jerry’s, Gen Z leads the trend.

34 percent of the younger generation admitted to canceling by telling their friends they forgot or were double-booked.

While Gen X ‘feels most comfortable’ cancelling, statistics show.

‘Three in four Australians say they’ve used an excuse, whether true or false, to cancel plans when they’d rather stay in than go out.’

While half of all Australians admit they feel energized after deciding to stay at home.

Psychologist Cass Dunn says we often agree to plans without taking the time to consider how we'll feel that day.

Psychologist Cass Dunn says we often agree to plans without taking the time to consider how we'll feel that day.

Psychologist Cass Dunn says we often agree to plans without taking the time to consider how we’ll feel that day.

People reveal their ‘craziest excuses’ to cancel.

1 – I’m too popular to leave the house.

2 – I have to stay home to look after my plants.

3 – Sorry I can’t come, I have a lot of dandruff and I need to wash my hair

4 – My cat is pregnant (said by someone who doesn’t have a cat)

5 – My kids have filled the laundry with soap and paint and I need to fix it before it gets on the carpet or the dog.

6 – My car’s headlights are not working.

7 – My pets will miss me a lot when I go out.

Dr Dunn says this is because we often make future plans because it ‘feels good in the moment’ and don’t properly consider how we might be feeling that day.

She said, ‘We often commit to things in the future, assuming that this future of us will feel energized, motivated and friendly after a long week.’

‘Eventually those decisions catch up with us and we have to face the fact that we’ve agreed to do something we really don’t want to do.’

This creates inner turmoil as we are faced with two options, move out when we don’t want to or leave someone we care about.

‘When we summon the nerve to send a text and cancel plans, we experience not only instant relief but sheer joy,’ she said.

‘We’re hit with a flood of dopamine in our brain’s reward center and it feels really good.’

Dr. Dunn wants people to feel okay opting out of their plans if they decide they don’t want to go with them and says there’s no need to come up with an excuse to be sick.

‘Letting ourselves off the hook can be a great act of self-care and we shouldn’t feel guilty about prioritizing what we need for some time,’ she said.

'We're hit with a flood of dopamine in our brain's reward center and it feels really good.'

'We're hit with a flood of dopamine in our brain's reward center and it feels really good.'

‘We’re hit with a flood of dopamine in our brain’s reward center and it feels really good.’

Before canceling, Dr. Dunn likes to remind herself of the relief she feels when others cancel.

“Sometimes the only thing more fun than canceling plans is having to cancel on the other person,” he said.

‘So when I cancel, I like to think that maybe my friend gets as much relief from receiving my text as I do from sending it.’

Ben and Jerry are calling. People have come to taunt their friends for the perfect excuse.

They’re rewarding the winner with a koala couch and a year’s supply of ice cream so they can spend as much anti-school time at home as possible.

Flicky friends have until September 30 to enter the contest.

When is canceling a bad idea?

Opting out of Friday night drinks after work is fairly low-stakes, but deciding not to turn up for a special birthday dinner that’s pre-booked or catered is an entirely different scenario and one where you Will want to try no matter how tempting. This is a home stay.

If you’re canceling a lot of plans, it could be a sign that you need to stop making so many plans first and ask for more time before gracefully declining invitations or making a commitment. Some strategies need to be learned. A simple sentence like, ‘That sounds great. Let me check the calendar and get back to you’ gives you time to really think about whether you want to agree to something or if you want to avoid awkwardness later and decline now.

If you’re the friend who always cancels, you risk a reputation for being flaky and unreliable. If you consistently disappoint people, eventually those social invitations will die out, so you may want to think about rescheduling those plans or being the one to extend the invitation next time.

In extreme cases, social withdrawal, especially if your mood and energy levels are low, can be a warning sign of a larger mental health problem that needs attention.

Source: Cass Dunn

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