“My boyfriend finally stopped seeing other women, but now my eyes are cold”

“I told him to come back when he was ready for an adult relationship” (Photo: Neil Webb / Metro.co.uk)

‘Four months ago I started go out together a man who was clear that he was dating different women as a result of difficult relationships.

I met his friends, we left and we talked constantly but he also saw other women.

Even though I knew what I had accepted, I ended it.

Then he said he consider exclusivity with me, but dating several women had been “the most fun he’s ever had.”

I told him to come back when he was ready for an adult relationship.

Now he doesn’t want to leave me alone and my eyes are cold. What do you recommend?

He is finally ready to commit and you have some apprehensions. So, was he more attractive when he wasn’t available? Or are you afraid of being betrayed by him?

Trust is still a big deal in a new relationship, but it was amplified for you because he was honest about dating others, ”says Dr. Angharad Rudkin. ‘You really love him but are you enough for him? He likes you, but is it enough for you? ‘

Although you have been clear about your needs, you have only known each other for a short time and you still may not know what his words really mean.

“Maybe he once mentioned dating a lot of women was ‘the most fun he’s ever had’ or maybe it’s something he’s referred to a lot of times,” says Rudkin. “It is important to identify which one it is because it will let you know if it has aroused insecurities in you or if it is someone who really thinks more of himself than of you. “

Because even if you say you know what you agreed to, being “honest” is no excuse for doing what you want.

“It’s one thing to have an open and relaxed relationship,” says James McConnachie. “It’s another to have one that’s off balance, where he commits without offering it – and gives himself a card without getting out of jail by claiming he was honest from the start.”

You may find that he is not able to give you what you deserve right now.

“So, it might be best if you hold back from any engagement until you’re both in the same place at the same time,” says Rupert Smith. “You could even give her a taste of her own meds and hang out with other people rather than putting all your eggs in a very rickety (and too full) basket.”

Ask yourself the following question: was it the most fun I have ever had?

“Otherwise,” said McConnachie, “why would you settle for less than that? “

Do you have a dilemma between sex and dating?

For expert advice, send your issue to lisa.scott@metro.co.uk

Do you have a story to share?

Contact us by email MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

FOLLOWING : “Is there still time to mend our marriage?” “

FOLLOWING : Signs of self-sabotage in your relationship and how to fix it

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