Dear Abby: Mother-in-law brought virus into pregnant woman’s home

Dear Abby,

My husband and I are expecting our second child. Our first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, so we were overjoyed to learn that I was pregnant again, this time with a little girl. We already named her “Mandy”.

Everything was going well until a month ago. My mother-in-law came to her birthday party to eat a cake. I haven’t seen her all weekend. Since our relationship is not as good as it could be, I didn’t ask her why. Two days later she told my husband that she had COVID and we needed to get tested too. She spent all weekends away from home, running, meeting people and visiting different places. Then she came to our house, where I was 21 weeks pregnant and did everything to keep this pregnancy.

I became very ill for two weeks and although I recovered, I spent three nights in the hospital because our child is now suffering from my illness. I’m on bed rest now. We have no choice but to live day by day to help Mandy buy more time inside to grow. I struggle with anger and resentment about my MIL, but I try to stay positive and avoid toxicity so Mandy has a chance to fight. When all this settles down, how do I start solving this problem with my MIL?

— Furious in the East

Now you are doing the right thing by focusing on your little girl. How do you deal with this in the future should be guided by the answer to the question: when your mother-in-law found out that you were ill because she exposed you, did she apologize?

If she knew she had “a little bit of something” and approached anyway, let it help you and your husband in your future dealings with her, because her judgment is terrible. If not, try to forgive her for this terrible fear and let her build bridges if she can.

Dear Abby,

Four years ago, I learned that my 28-year-old husband was having an affair with a colleague. Two weeks after the exposure, the girl quit. I was devastated, but we made up.

During our reconciliation, I learned that five or six years before the affair, my best friend “Molly” had flirted with my husband during a sleepover for work. (She is known to be a bit loose.) She was a seasonal store manager and they had to go to another store about five hours away, which meant staying overnight. He never mentioned the affair again.

I have since become Molly’s ghost. She has been my best friend since childhood, and I felt that this was the greatest betrayal. As far as I understand, she is gone from my life. She recently started sending me requests on Facebook. I know that in time she will call again. I don’t want to talk to her and I don’t know what to say. Please help me.

– burned down in the south

Stop hiding. If Molly calls you, take her call, tell her that you know what she did with your husband on that trip, that you feel it was the greatest betrayal and that you don’t want to hear from her again. Then end the call.

Dear Abby

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

This article originally appeared in Providence magazine: Dear Abby: Mother-in-law brought virus into pregnant woman’s home